I don’t get it. Back in school, having a teacher spring a quiz on us elicited groans and anxiety, but several readers have remarked that they particularly like the posts containing quizzes. So here you go.
Each sentence below can be improved in one or more ways. Look for errors and extra words.
1. Already guzzling a third cocktail, Susie’s conversation turned more racy in nature.
2. If your going to consume a record amount of hors d’oeuvres, maybe you should lay off of the desserts.
3. The Wilson’s throw great barbeques on a consistent basis, I love their “honeyburgers.”
The answers
1. Already guzzling a third cocktail, Susie’s conversation turned more racy in nature.
“Conversations” can’t guzzle; people do. Therefore, we have a dangling modifier. “Guzzling” refers to Susie, not her conversation, so “Susie” needs to follow the comma.
“More racy” should be “racier.” Two-syllable adjectives generally just need “-er” or “-ier” for the comparative form and “-est” or “-iest” for superlative.
“In nature” is almost always unnecessary. (“Happy in nature”? No. Just “happy.”)
Improved version: By Susie’s third cocktail, her conversation was already turning racier.
2. If your going to consume a record amount of hors d’oeuvres, maybe you should lay off of the desserts.
“Your” is wrong, of course. We want the contraction “you’re.”
The hors d’oeuvres are individual items we can count, so the correct word is “number,” not “amount.”
The preposition “of” is clutter after “off” – just as it almost always is after “inside” and “outside” (http://bit.ly/1K8Uh3D).
“Hors d’oeuvres” is spelled correctly. Award yourself bonus points if you knew that.
Improved version: If you’re going to consume a record number of hors d’oeuvres, maybe you should lay off the desserts.
3. The Wilson’s throw great barbeques on a consistent basis, I love their “honeyburgers.”
Resist the urge to stick an apostrophe in a last name when making it plural. If we have more than one Wilson, we have Wilsons.
The correct spelling is “barbecues.”
Watch out for “basis,” as in “on a daily basis.” Usually, all we need is “daily,” and here all we need is “consistently.”
We’re not supposed to separate two independent thoughts with a comma. We can fix the “comma splice” in several ways, such as plunking down a period and starting a new sentence, using a semicolon, or using a connector like “and.”
The period inside the quotation mark is correct. Sorry, no bonus. You should know that (http://bit.ly/1PmxRPY).
Improved version: The Wilsons consistently throw great barbecues; I love their “honeyburgers.”
You are done. Now fire up that grill.
In addition to presenting workshops on writing in the workplace, Norm Friedman is a writer, editor, and writing coach. His 100+ Instant Writing Tips is a brief “non-textbook” to help individuals overcome common writing errors and write with more finesse and impact. Learn more at http://www.normfriedman.com/index.shtml.